Matzoh Ball Souperciliosity

My two favorite holidays are Thanksgiving and Passover. No surprise they both involve a whole lot of people sitting around eating a whole lot of food.

If I could have the perfect day, it would involve a big group of (everchanging) people sitting down to table again and again. We’d start with breakfast split-catered by Russ & Daughters and Zabars, followed up by a huge brunch catered by Sarabeths (lots of bacon and popovers at this one). Then we’d all have a picnic in Prospect Park. And then maybe a bar-b-que. And then a pig on a spit, but of course afterwards we’d have to jet off to an oyster roast, probably on Martha’s Vineyard. Then the sun would be setting, and since we’re on the Vineyard, someone would be handing us cocktails (involving gin, lots of gin). Then, maybe back to Brooklyn for a little Stone Park Café, as I do love their octopus appetizer. I sure hope this local classic still recognizes me, what with their recent accolades, and JChef's recent lobotomy.

But I didn’t have a perfect day this week; I had a haggadah and some communion crackers. This goes to prove that for centuries, company and tradition have salvaged some of the least fulfilling meals. No dairy, no leavening, and we Jews, we still manage to eek out a half decent dessert (long live the macaroon! the candied citrus wedge! the dark chocolate filled with marshmallow!).

I enjoyed two Passovers this year; one with old college friends, and one with family. At the first, there were a handful of lesbians, a straight man pretending to be gay, a 4-month old listening to mama’s Mardi Gras improprieties (also known as a doctor, a vet, a coupla entrepreneurs, and some kick-ass executives). We talked a lot about Viagra, breast feeding and single motherhood, and the dog ate part of my super hip Betsy Johnson jacket. If the dog doesn’t get too sick, I hope to be invited again next year.

At the other was my smiling grandmother, full of love and a level of enthusiasm only had by those who get to relive life over and over again; those without their youthful memory. She’s leasing-to-buy an elder-care home, and our Passover dining hall was chock full of aging European Jews.

My grandmother, while reintroducing my cousin, aunt, uncle and me to our elderly tablemates for the twelfth time, yet again shared with the group that my brother (my younger brother, such a shame she isn’t married, no boyfriend even) is expecting, and this will be her second grandchild. She offered a kinahura, a spit-spit, a mazel, and a round of applause. “Oh lucky me, lucky me!” she said. And she meant it for the first time, each and every time.

But what I left thinking about were those elegant, mannered, intelligent folks with whom I shared I table. I believe I broke (unleavened) bread with a room full of Holocaust survivors. I was angry at first, angry that they were there, at this facility. Where is their family? And why are they alone? Until I remembered that we were alone together, and that we both felt sorry for each other, in our own way.

So in their honor, I’m offering my matzoh ball soup. It’s a recipe cobbled together from a bunch of bubbies, and since my dad asked for thirds at Seder last year, I’m guessing it must be pretty good. To Life, To Life, L’Chaim.


Chicken Soup with Matzoh Balls

For chicken soup:
5 pounds of good quality chicken (one big bird has the strongest flavor, but you can try two 2 1/2 pound birds, one 2 1/2 pound birds, plus extra wings and legs and stuff…just let it add up to 5 pounds)
1 big leek, sliced lengthwise and cut into 3/4-inch pieces, washed well
3 carrots, sliced into 1/2-inch rounds
4 stalks celery, sliced 1/2-inch thick
A few sprigs of dill or parsley, chopped

For matzoh balls:
1 cup matzoh meal
4 eggs, lightly beaten
1/4 cup seltzer
1/4 cup chicken schmaltz (yum!) or margarine
1/2 teaspoon ground ginger
1/4 teaspoon cayenne
1 teaspoon salt

1. For Soup: Cut up the chicken. Either buy it cut up, ask your butcher to do it, or take out a knife and hack the thing up yourself. Be sure to cut up the thick-bone areas like the neck, backbone, wings and thighs. You want all that marrowy goodness to flavor and enrich the soup, so get your cleaver out and get to it. Cut off the breasts and throw them in the freezer for another time. Rip off the skin and reserve it, we’ll use it for the balls. (Oh don’t get grossed out, I didn’t ask you to start with a live bird, now did I?)

2. Put the cut-up chicken in the pot; add the leek, carrots and celery. Cover the whole mess with water; you’ll be adding about 10 to 12 cups of liquid. Bring to a boil; turn the heat to low and simmer for about an hour. Pull out the chicken and carrots and reserve; pour the rest of the liquid through a strainer. Discard the vegetables; you should be left with a lovely golden liquid.

3. To render Schmaltz (Chicken Fat): Putt reserved chicken fat in a medium skillet or saucepan. Turn heat to medium-low, fat will slowly render out (that liquid in the bottom of the skillet; it’s schmaltz!). Pour off fat occasionally, into a heatproof bowl, and turn the skin occasionally so that all sides have a chance to render.

4. For the Matzoh balls: Combine matzoh meal, eggs, seltzer, schmaltz, ginger, cayenne and salt. Stir well. Cover; refrigerate for 30 minutes.

5. Bring a pot of salted water to a boil. Moisten hands with cold water (do this continually, throughout ball production), and begin rolling. Balls should be no more than 1-inch in diameter, as these things EXPAND in the water. Drop balls into boiling water, cover, and continue simmering for 30 minutes. Reserve balls in cooking liquid.

6. To Assemble: Be sure the matzoh balls and chicken soup are nice and hot; pour soup (and a few carrots, if desired) into a bowl; add matzoh ball (be gentle, these are super tender balls), and a few pieces of dill or parsley. Serve; take a bow.